Over the Labor Day weekend my husband was channel surfing and happened to land on a station that was featuring a marathon of the show “Friends”. The show always had extremely high ratings, and still does even now that it is in syndication. Although “Friends” was a light-hearted comedy, every episode always seems to unveil some worthwhile life lesson hidden underneath the laughter. The central thread throughout every episode no matter how silly it got; these six individuals were always there for each other — no matter how ridiculous things got. I have to admit that it took me a few years to even get interested enough to watch the show. But with all the bad news in the world and the derogatory programming that dominates the television and movie theatres, it’s good to sometimes just sit back, relax, and enjoy some nonsensical humor. A day or so after the “Friends” marathon, I was reading a book that was given to me and an entire chapter was dedicated to the importance of friendship. So, as I reflected upon the two incidences, my thoughts went a little deeper.

I know we’re probably all weary of talking about, thinking about, and reacting to the effects of this pandemic. However, I still think there are so many life lessons we are still yet to learn. If not, I firmly believe the Lord would have put an end to it a long time ago. You know, He’s able to do that at any point, don’t you? In light of that fact, I’m still asking myself what else should I be learning from this life altering situation that still has the world in its grips. Although, restrictions are steadily being lifted, we went for months without much social contact other than with those in our household. Yes, we “zoomed” and “google met”, Face Timed, and texted like nobody’s business!! We became masters of the social media world in order to stay in touch. But, for many of us that is the extent of it – we merely (and barely) stayed in touch! We were not able to meet up for coffee or go out to dinner, or just sit and chat. It was like we were closed off but not totally isolated. But scientists, psychologists, and those in the medical profession tell us that as human beings we are “wired” for social and personal contact. I feel that this pandemic has actually social distanced us to the point that we have developed a lifestyle now in which we will actually have to deprogram ourselves to regain and become comfortable again with real social involvement. We prefer to text rather than call. We text instead of sending “thank you” cards. Less and less personal contact has become the acceptable order of the day. While on the subject I must mention Facebook. I marvel sometimes at the number of “friends” some people have. Some people I know personally, have hundreds and thousands of so-called “friends”. But how many of those hundreds and thousands do they even really know? Dictionary.com’s first two definitions of “friend” are: “a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard; “a person who gives assistance, a supporter”. The Bible speaks of true friendship in this manner, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than any brother.” I believe that the Lord wanted us to understand how important it is to have true friends. He goes so far to say that even when your own family deserts you, there will be a friend that will step in to fill that void. What gives me great concern is that during a time in our lives when we need friends most, we have developed our own personal strategies and concocted what we deem valid reasons for our retreat and isolation unto ourselves. Quite frankly, this can be very detrimental to our overall mental wellbeing. The storms of life, complete with unexpected situations and dark clouds, have not lessened during these pandemic months. If anything, they may have increased significantly. It is during these stressful times that we need the companionship of that true friend or friends. And I might add, a true friend, does not need to know all the gory details. That individual whom you know to be a genuine friend will be the one you can turn to when there are no real words to describe how you’re feeling. That is the friend who will be there with a hug, a kind word, and a shoulder to cry on when needed. That friend will drop what they’re doing to be there for you in troubled times and desperate circumstances.

It is important that we all have that kind of friend. I marvel at the folks who are so popular they have tons of friends. But honestly, I have grown to treasure the few I can place in the category of “true friends”. They are the ones I know I can count on. I make it my business to let them know how much I love and appreciate them. Although we may not have the privilege of being in each other’s presence due to distance or busyness of life’s schedules, I know without a doubt they are there. To flip the “friendship” coin, that is the kind of friend I strive to be. I don’t just want to be a taker; I honestly want to be a giver as well. Someone needs your listening ear, your smile, your presence, and reassurance that they are not alone. I encourage you to take some time to think about those special, God-given people in your life, your true friends. No time like the present to refresh and renew those relationships, some even irreplaceable, that are more precious than silver and gold.